Bad cars come and go, but flops are forever.
Psst—hey, pal! Yeah, you! You wanna buy a truck, right? Tell you what I’m gonna do: Hows about we find you a special truck, one just for you and your refined tastes, see? You like luxury? We got luxury: This beauty may look like a crew-cab F-150, but it’s a Lincoln, and it drives like one, sure as I’m standin’ here. You look like a Lincoln kind of guy, you know that? You know Tony Soprano was a Lincoln guy? You want a cigar? I got some Cubans in my coat. Hold on.
Check out the cargo box: It’s lined in carpet and gen-yoo-wine stainless steel. That’s stainless —means it can’t be stained. You can’t carry nuthin’ heavy or dirty in
it without uglying it up, but it makes for a nice trunk, see? And that
bed cover? It’s power-operated! Opens to a 45-degree angle, it does!
That’s real, honest-to-God imitation African wenge wood on the
sides of the bed, there—them Lincoln folks photographed it and
reproduced it in vinyl and everything, and I got a cousin Sal over in
Jersey who says it don’t fade fer nuthin’, not even when you get some
blood on it. Only 3000 of these dealies were made this year, and it only
costs $52,000, and it only comes in black, and…
What? Why you walkin’ away? Was it somethin’ I said? I thought we had a
deal! You want I should show you the LED lights in the trunk?
No comments:
Post a Comment